Day 5 in prison…it is finally the first snow of the season, trees have gone lifeless, a thick white blanket of snow has is protecting them from the chill outside. Mother Nature is playing the part to hide her children from the world outside similar to what my mother used to do when the mercury dipped during this time of the year. Sitting in my prison cell 700miles away from my mother, serving a sentence for a theft, I realize that suddenly the world has changed for me. For the world outside I am a thief, a prisoner and a woman incapable of living among a civilized society just because I wanted to take something that didn’t belong to me, something which could have brought a new meaning to my life and most importantly something that could have given me a new reason to live. Suddenly a chilled breeze from the small window blew and it passed right through me, it gave me a similar feeling when my mother used to hug me during my tough times. Trying to hold this breeze I hugged myself and tears started to roll down…I never felt so alone in my whole life. 10 days back the urge to have something overpowered my urge to be moral. I did something which I could have never thought of but its first glance did that magic on me. It was a child…a baby boy born an hour before to my best friend Bella. Bella and I have been friends for 7 years, we first met at high school. Smart and intelligent girl with no friends, no mother and no home of her own. I was the first and perhaps the only one to share my lunch with her. Slowly we became best friends and we used to share every secret among us. She meant the whole world to me until I met Edward. After high school as Edward and I started seeing each other more often my interactions with Bella got limited to weekends, she seemed happy but something was going inside her which I could feel every time I met her. Maybe the fact that her best friend has someone more important in her life was troubling her but I was sure that with time she would accept this fact and she would also meet someone destined for her. On one fine day I received call from San Jose State University, my request for admission was approved. I had mixed emotions at one side I was going to pursue my dream and on the other I had to move away from Edward. Finally I decided to move to my uncle’s home at Palo Alto to join SJSU. Both Edward and Bella had come to see me off. Days at SJSU pass like years, long boring lectures, workshops, seminars and a 30min drive back to Palo Alto left me exhausted. As the course progressed I became so busy that I had to talk to Edward on alternate days which finally got limited to weekends within 6months. Life was going fine until the day I received that ill-fated call. It was from St. Stephens’s hospital at Phoenix, Arizona. The nurse said… “Your friend Bella and her boyfriend met with an accident last night, unfortunately we could not save the guy. Since Bella is in the 8th month of her pregnancy the injuries have caused certain complications due to which we need to perform a cesarean immediately. Since Bella has no family she has recommended your name to sign family approval document”. I booked the next available flight and flew to Arizona. All my way I was thinking about Bella, the days we spent together and our friendship. My friend was expecting her first child, her boyfriend was dead and I didn’t had a slightest idea of what all was happening in her life, somewhere deep inside I was feeling guilty but I wanted to be with Bella as soon as possible. I reached the hospital, Bella was unconscious due to the sedatives given to her. I signed the approval papers and waited outside, suddenly I heard an old woman weeping aloud outside mortuary. I went running to her why was she crying, what went wrong? As I was about to reach near her two men brought a dead body out from mortuary on a stretcher. It was Edward’s mother weeping there and the body they brought was of Edward’s. I was froze in shock, the world around me had suddenly gone still, nothing was moving, I was able to see the old lady crying but her cries were not audible anymore to me. Suddenly everything went blank I could feel my whole body going down, I wanted to be with Edward but my body refused to go any further and I fainted. I woke up in a room with glucose drip on my right hand with Edward’s mother sitting on my side. By this time everything got connected, I had solved the puzzle only to find out that I had lost everything. With tears in her eyes she looked at me and asked how I was feeling, she had asked a question to which I myself had no answer. How was I feeling, sad because the guy I loved was dead, betrayed because my best friend was carrying Edward’s child and guy for which I thought to sacrifice my career had lied to me everytime and a loser because I had lost everything. Edward’s mom told me that Bella has been taken to operation theatre and doctors are expecting delivery anytime, they are trying their best to save both Bella and her child. Tears started rolling down and I was not able to hold my emotions I had lost everything. Those moments I had spent with Edward started flashing in front of my eyes and every time I could feel Bella laughing at me. I tied to hate Edward for betraying me but I couldn’t. I didn’t wanted to go back neither I wished to stay there. The old lady was comforting me, maybe the fact that her loss was more than mine was the reason I was able to control myself. After half an hour a nurse came into my room and informed Bella has given birth to a baby boy. We both rushed to the maternity ward, it was a small baby wrapped in white cloth, Bella was still unconscious but doctors said she was out of danger. The nurse handed over the baby in my hands, he had Edward’s eyes. Just by holding him I felt a positive energy inside me, I felt like Edward has come back to me, he looked into my eyes and smiled similar to what Edward used to do. I hugged him closely and kissed him. I felt I had not lost Edward he has come back to me again. The nurse told me they have to take the baby back to its mother, those words irked me. For them it was just Bella’s baby for me it was my reason to live again, it was Edward’s last gift to me I could not let him go back to Bella, she had already taken a lot from me but not anymore, so I decided something which changed my life forever. At the stroke of midnight I went into Bella’s room, took the baby in my arms and left. Yes I stole what belonged to me and that is not any excuse but my explanation, a thief’s explanation!
Wednesday 4 July 2012
Thief's Explanation
Day 5 in prison…it is finally the first snow of the season, trees have gone lifeless, a thick white blanket of snow has is protecting them from the chill outside. Mother Nature is playing the part to hide her children from the world outside similar to what my mother used to do when the mercury dipped during this time of the year. Sitting in my prison cell 700miles away from my mother, serving a sentence for a theft, I realize that suddenly the world has changed for me. For the world outside I am a thief, a prisoner and a woman incapable of living among a civilized society just because I wanted to take something that didn’t belong to me, something which could have brought a new meaning to my life and most importantly something that could have given me a new reason to live. Suddenly a chilled breeze from the small window blew and it passed right through me, it gave me a similar feeling when my mother used to hug me during my tough times. Trying to hold this breeze I hugged myself and tears started to roll down…I never felt so alone in my whole life. 10 days back the urge to have something overpowered my urge to be moral. I did something which I could have never thought of but its first glance did that magic on me. It was a child…a baby boy born an hour before to my best friend Bella. Bella and I have been friends for 7 years, we first met at high school. Smart and intelligent girl with no friends, no mother and no home of her own. I was the first and perhaps the only one to share my lunch with her. Slowly we became best friends and we used to share every secret among us. She meant the whole world to me until I met Edward. After high school as Edward and I started seeing each other more often my interactions with Bella got limited to weekends, she seemed happy but something was going inside her which I could feel every time I met her. Maybe the fact that her best friend has someone more important in her life was troubling her but I was sure that with time she would accept this fact and she would also meet someone destined for her. On one fine day I received call from San Jose State University, my request for admission was approved. I had mixed emotions at one side I was going to pursue my dream and on the other I had to move away from Edward. Finally I decided to move to my uncle’s home at Palo Alto to join SJSU. Both Edward and Bella had come to see me off. Days at SJSU pass like years, long boring lectures, workshops, seminars and a 30min drive back to Palo Alto left me exhausted. As the course progressed I became so busy that I had to talk to Edward on alternate days which finally got limited to weekends within 6months. Life was going fine until the day I received that ill-fated call. It was from St. Stephens’s hospital at Phoenix, Arizona. The nurse said… “Your friend Bella and her boyfriend met with an accident last night, unfortunately we could not save the guy. Since Bella is in the 8th month of her pregnancy the injuries have caused certain complications due to which we need to perform a cesarean immediately. Since Bella has no family she has recommended your name to sign family approval document”. I booked the next available flight and flew to Arizona. All my way I was thinking about Bella, the days we spent together and our friendship. My friend was expecting her first child, her boyfriend was dead and I didn’t had a slightest idea of what all was happening in her life, somewhere deep inside I was feeling guilty but I wanted to be with Bella as soon as possible. I reached the hospital, Bella was unconscious due to the sedatives given to her. I signed the approval papers and waited outside, suddenly I heard an old woman weeping aloud outside mortuary. I went running to her why was she crying, what went wrong? As I was about to reach near her two men brought a dead body out from mortuary on a stretcher. It was Edward’s mother weeping there and the body they brought was of Edward’s. I was froze in shock, the world around me had suddenly gone still, nothing was moving, I was able to see the old lady crying but her cries were not audible anymore to me. Suddenly everything went blank I could feel my whole body going down, I wanted to be with Edward but my body refused to go any further and I fainted. I woke up in a room with glucose drip on my right hand with Edward’s mother sitting on my side. By this time everything got connected, I had solved the puzzle only to find out that I had lost everything. With tears in her eyes she looked at me and asked how I was feeling, she had asked a question to which I myself had no answer. How was I feeling, sad because the guy I loved was dead, betrayed because my best friend was carrying Edward’s child and guy for which I thought to sacrifice my career had lied to me everytime and a loser because I had lost everything. Edward’s mom told me that Bella has been taken to operation theatre and doctors are expecting delivery anytime, they are trying their best to save both Bella and her child. Tears started rolling down and I was not able to hold my emotions I had lost everything. Those moments I had spent with Edward started flashing in front of my eyes and every time I could feel Bella laughing at me. I tied to hate Edward for betraying me but I couldn’t. I didn’t wanted to go back neither I wished to stay there. The old lady was comforting me, maybe the fact that her loss was more than mine was the reason I was able to control myself. After half an hour a nurse came into my room and informed Bella has given birth to a baby boy. We both rushed to the maternity ward, it was a small baby wrapped in white cloth, Bella was still unconscious but doctors said she was out of danger. The nurse handed over the baby in my hands, he had Edward’s eyes. Just by holding him I felt a positive energy inside me, I felt like Edward has come back to me, he looked into my eyes and smiled similar to what Edward used to do. I hugged him closely and kissed him. I felt I had not lost Edward he has come back to me again. The nurse told me they have to take the baby back to its mother, those words irked me. For them it was just Bella’s baby for me it was my reason to live again, it was Edward’s last gift to me I could not let him go back to Bella, she had already taken a lot from me but not anymore, so I decided something which changed my life forever. At the stroke of midnight I went into Bella’s room, took the baby in my arms and left. Yes I stole what belonged to me and that is not any excuse but my explanation, a thief’s explanation!
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